As the 5th episode of The Tourist begins, we see a distraught Helen Chambers (Danielle Macdonald) trying to come to grips with the murder she just witnessed. She calls the station to report a murder. Elliot (Jamie Dornan) rides with Detective Inspector Lachlan Rogers (Damon Herriman) and tries to figure out what Kostas wants with him. Rogers doesn’t have a clue although it likely isn’t good to have a person like Kostas (Alex Dimitriades) coming after you. As they continue, Elliot says he is thirsty and asks whether Rogers breaks the law regularly. Lachlan admits he just deals with the job at hand. Elliot asks what happens if the job is to drown an overweight five-year-old Belgian kid in the bath. Rogers doesn’t understand why he’d pick that. They argue about it a bit as Rogers says he doesn’t enjoy it any more than Elliot does. Elliot disagrees. Lachlan explains you begin seeing things differently when you only have six months to live.

As he tells Elliot what happened, we see a flashback of Kostas Panigiris calling Rogers and saying this is the worst day of his life. While Rodney Lammon (Kamil Ellis) dances in the car, Rogers is shown a video of his wife who is being held hostage to ensure he cooperates. Kostas wants him to bring Elliot to him and warns him not to call his police friends. He is told it isn’t a difficult choice to choose between Elliot Stanley and the woman he loves. As they pull up near Kostas, he is talking on the phone with one of his guys who complains about Rogers’s wife and reveals she is a cop too. While Kostas tells the guy to stay calm, Elliot walks over to his drink, unscrews the lid, and eventually chugs it. Kostas headbutts him and kicks him on the ground while Rogers says he doesn’t remember anything. Kostas tells Rogers they’re still hunting so they’re not finished yet. He shows Elliot the guy in the back of the vehicle to threaten him. Kostas wants to know about the bag and asks whether she took it. Elliot agrees to show him where the bag is hidden.

Luci (Shalom Brune-Franklin) calls Helen to say Elliot can stop running because she is going to take care of things. Helen doesn’t think she understands since she just watched a cop shooting another cop and take Elliot with him. She wants to know what Luci is talking about when she said she is going to take care of things. Luci is encouraged to come to the Dusty Moon Motel in Kalura Creek to tell them what is going on. As Luci heads outside, she bumps into a man, takes his keys, and steals his car. Moments later, police officers in several cars meet with Helen. Sergeant Pam Renton (Elena Carapetis) introduces herself to Helen and explains it took them a long time to get here because they had to finish breakfast. She shows Pam where it happened and says she already talked to the receptionist. Pam tells her to let them do their job and she should do hers. She knows people who know Rogers and doesn’t believe what Helen is saying.

As Kostas rides with Elliot, he talks to Dimitri (Alex Andreas) who isn’t actually there. They talk about the hunt and Kostas feeling alive again. Elliot leans over to ask whether he is talking to him before asking him to open the window because it is so hot. When he looks out of the window, he hallucinates and sees something in the sky. They stop by the stone men and Rogers takes the cuffs off of Elliot’s wrists. Kostas orders Rogers to get the shovels. As Elliot walks toward the stone structures, he imagines they’re turning orange with energy. He tells the others how beautiful it is even though they can’t see anything. Kostas tells him to hurry up and asks if he forgot where he put the million bucks. Elliot points to a spot where they begin digging seconds later. Once Elliot jabs the shovel into the ground, he imagines he is in a wheelchair at the hospital. He stands up and tries to exit but can’t because the door is locked. Then, he finds a weird sign that says things like Childhood, Obsession with Signage, Abandonment Issues, and Impending Mid-Life Crisis.

He hears his father (William Zappa) calling for him from one of the hospital rooms nearby. Elliot is wearing a suit by the time he steps into the room. His father is surprised to see him since he didn’t think he’d make it. They discuss Elliot trying to learn to play the piano although he didn’t like it and was always horrible at it. His father claims he only went because it was easier than telling his mother no. He grabs Elliot’s hand and says he never pushes. When his father lets go of his hand, the machine goes off so Elliot screams for a doctor. As he exits the room, he is no longer wearing a suit and he is all alone. He steps through another door and finds himself on a beach. He walks over to the bar where he met Luci for the first time. They briefly talk about Elliot’s sunburn and the fact he didn’t use sunscreen before he properly introduces himself. Luci says her name is Victoria. He tells her about the other women named Victoria he knew and how they had foot fetishes.

Victoria invites him back to her room where she likely has some aloe vera he can use for the sunburn. They go back to her room and immediately have sex. Once they’ve finished, they discuss seeing one another again. He asks whether this is a memory, but she doesn’t know because it is his subconscious. At dinner, he meets with Kostas and finally meets him for the first time. The waiter arrives to see if they’re ready to order. Kostas says they’re waiting on someone and it happens to be Luci who joins them seconds later. They kiss as Kostas introduces Victoria as his fiancée. Kostas says this is Elliot and he works for him. Elliot gets up and walks away before returning to the hospital. He begins throwing up and does the same in the present as Rogers and Kostas watch. Kostas complains that the man drank his LSD since it was in the black bottle Elliot chugged earlier. Kosta explains it was a micro-dose and a special blend he uses to enhance his creativity.

He shows Rogers a picture of his latest sculpture to prove how much it helps him. Since Elliot is going to be high and useless for a bit longer, Kostas orders Roger to dig the hole instead. Lachlan asks if he believes in karma, but Kostas only believes in digging. Luci calls Kostas to say she has something he wants. She promises it’ll change everything, but he’ll only get it if he doesn’t hurt Elliot. When Helen asks Renton whether they found anything, Renton says it doesn’t seem like it. She encourages Helen to go home since they have a statement. When Helen asks about Rogers, she is reminded that it isn’t her case. Helen immediately calls Luci in hopes of convincing her to talk about what she knows. She tells Luci they want the same thing which is to prevent him from getting hurt before wondering whether it could be connected to the weird stone men she found on the camera. She pleads with Luci to let her help and be the calvary. Seconds later, Helen tells Renton she knows where they’re at.

Rogers continues digging while Elliot plays with the sand. When he is asked about the bag, we see a flashback of Kostas showing him the bag and calling it his trophy. He explains the bag contains the first million he made by carrying drugs for dangerous men, stealing, and lying. He discusses the root of all evil and the tree and its roots. Elliot knows because he is an accountant. Elliot goes downstairs where a man is working on a rifle. The man admits he got the money speech from Kostas when he started working for him as well. They agree to go for a beer later. Elliot steps back into the hospital and tries to leave, but he is stopped by a woman at a desk. He is told they’re ready for him so he can go through now. Once he steps inside, Elliot encounters the tour guide who is now calling himself Colin Callend and claiming he is an accountant from his father’s firm. He says the conversation happened 15 years ago and people don’t remember things word for word.

Instead, people capture thumbnails and their brains fill in the gaps when they try to remember something. He shows Elliot a picture of himself back then and calls the conversation and informal discussion. Elliot is asked why he turned down the job offer only to begin working with an international drug dealer years later. Colin mentions Kostas and says he made a small fortune shipping narcotics around the globe. When Elliot tries to leave, he runs into his father and immediately says he needs to wake up. Then, he finds himself in a motel with a book that says, “That Time You Escapes With Lucy & The Bag Hotel”. We see black and white scenes of Luci taking the bag to Elliot’s room and asking him to run with her.

They are chased by two men as they try to flee the motel. They’re chased outside where they hide in the storage compartment of a tour bus. She apologizes for everything and knows he has questions. Elliot keeps being hit with a shovel as Kostas and Rogers try to get him to dig. Luci begins explaining that she didn’t meet Kosta by chance. Instead, she met someone close to him and that gave her the idea. She goes on to say that she convinces people to separate from their money. She prefers being called a con woman instead of a thief. She was in it for more than a million bucks, but everything changed when she met Elliot because she decided to run away with him. She recommends going to Australia since it has plenty of places to hide. Luci or Victoria believes they can live happily ever after although this isn’t going to happen. Soon, Elliot finds himself alone in a motel after she leaves him. He rolls over and finds Helen next to him. She says they lasted six weeks together before they separated.

He asks what happened between them that night, but she doesn’t know since she is Elliot. They kiss. Elliot wakes up as Kostas forces his head underwater. Kostas admits a part of him doesn’t want Elliot to tell him because it makes him feel so present. Rogers sees vehicles in the distance and becomes concerned. Helen and the others jump out of the van and begin looking around, but they find nothing. Kostas believes Rogers might be upset because he had to kill his policeman friend although Rogers says he didn’t have a choice. Kostas believes he made a good choice protecting his wife. Helen is ridiculed for sending them out there for nothing. She still believes Luci knows where they’re at. Lachlan begins pulling Rodney’s body and the other body from the trunk so they can bury them in the hole they already dug. Helen goes into town and finds Ethan Krum (Greg Larsen) at a restaurant so she joins him inside.

She sits down before saying she thought she could be the person to make a difference, but she only embarrassed herself. He complains about her disappearing so she reveals she was kidnapped by the man. He doesn’t want to believe her even though she swears it is true. She insists it is complicated because he was confused, scared, and never going to hurt her. Ethan says they should go put it behind them by filing a police report. Helen agrees. When Rogers asks Kostas why he is doing this, he says sometimes you should do it yourself when a job is worth doing. As the digging continues, Elliot notices a small, black pipe sticking out of the ground and that triggers another memory. Marko arrives at his motel room to tell him Victoria slipped up by using her credit card so they came to Australia to look for her. He confirms he is with Kosta’s distribution guy Billy Nixon. When he mentions Burnt Ridge, we see a scene showing the man pulling Marko’s body from the barrel.

He says he knocked on a lot of doors while looking for Victoria. Since he got along with Elliot, he didn’t show Billy the information on the paper he hands him. He believes she left it on his windscreen and was willing to listen to what he had to say. The note tells him to meet her at Gloria’s Diner in Burnt Ridge on the 26th. Marko is willing to help because Elliot never ratted him out to Kostas when he skimmed money from him. He wants Elliot to talk to Victoria and get everything sorted out. Before he goes, he gives Elliot a phone with his number in it and instructs him to only call if they need to talk. Elliot sees a dead Marko grabbing his arm and telling him he never pushes. When Elliot tries to leave his motel room with the bag, he is stopped by Billy who points a gun at him. As they begin walking, Billy tells Elliot what he did to Marko earlier in the morning.

He drives Marko up to the waterfall sign before headbutting him and knocking him to the ground. Elliot tells him he is pretty pleased with himself for a dead guy, but Billy doesn’t realize he is dead. When Marko comes to, he finds himself stuffed in a barrel with a gun pointed at his face. Billy convinced him to tell him where Elliot was hiding out although he promised to come back and get him if he was telling the truth. Billy says his mother used to lock him in the coal-scuttle when he messed up as a kid. He isn’t mean like his mother so he put a hole in the barrel with a pipe to ensure Marko could continue breathing. The man tells Billy he messed up since he let Marko keep his phone and he calls him while he was buried in there. Elliot admits he got there too late because Marko was allergic to scorpions. When he sees two cops, he pushes Billy away and screams that he isn’t going to film him on the toilet. That gives him enough time to flee.

Back in the hospital, he can’t seem to get the locked door open. A steering wheel rolls down the hallway and that leads to another memory. He droves out to the Nala Stone Men and goes into the shop to purchase a t-shirt and stuffed animal. He gets a free disposable camera with his purchase. The cashier tells him where the nearest gas station is at too. Once he hides the bag, he calls Marko and leaves a message telling him that the money is safe. He knows Marko had to do what he had to do so there are no hard feelings there. If something happens to him, he wants Marko to get the money to Victoria. He has written the location into the phone and will text him where to find it. He drives to the nearest gas station and hides the phone in the stuffed animal. It is stuffed behind the trash can. Then, he remembers being hit by Billy’s truck. Billy gets out with the intention of killing him but leaves when he spots a car driving toward them.

He wakes up on a hospital bed and hears his father complaining that he never pushes himself. He rams the hospital bed into the locked door and finally gets through. When he steps through, he encounters Lena Pascal (Victoria Haralabidou) who is speaking Russian. She says it is okay and that he speaks Russian. She claims he keeps seeing her because she matters. She wonders why he remembers everything else except for her. He asks her to help him understand because he doesn’t remember her or anyone named Lena Pascal. She knows him and thinks he knows where she is. She says Greenlanes Adelaide before telling him to come see her. He comes back to reality and tells Rogers and Kostas that she knows him. He remembers where he hid the money now as a car shows up in the distance. Kosta says your timing was always impeccable. When they ask who it is, Kostas says it is no one.

Elliot retrieves the bag full of money and gives it back to Kostas who is surprised so much is still in there. Luci shows up and tells Elliot she is trying to stop him from getting killed. Kostas says everyone who screwed him over is back together again before asking Luci if she has something he wants. She says yes and explains her car hadn’t broken down on the first day they met. Since she knew he’d be there, she was waiting for him. A while back, she started talking to Kostas brother and he told her all about him. She hands him her phone with his brother on the live stream. He tells Kosta hello and Kosta says what the heck.

 

The Tourist Review

The story is coming together although it is being delivered in an unconventional way. Some pieces are still missing and they could easily flip things upside-down in the sixth and final episode. However, it seems right now that the man or Elliot Stanley was an accountant who started working for Kostas.

He eventually had a one-night stand with Victoria or Luci who was going to swindle Kostas out of a lot of money. When she met Elliot, she decided to cut her plan short and run away with Elliot and Kostas’s bag that held the first million dollars he made. I suspected Luci would somehow be romantically involved with the man who was hunting Elliot.

While the delivery of the revelations was unique, I am not sure how effective or shocking it turned out to be. It was like a bad acid trip that one cannot escape until they ram a hospital bed through the locked door in front of them. The whole thing was silly and the cheesy dialogue didn’t make matters any better.

Put it this way, my expectations for the finale have hit the floor. I didn’t have a lot of hope for the finale before this and honestly expect it to be an unsatisfying mess. I hope I am wrong so I can say the six-episode series was worthwhile. The story is actually interesting at times, but it regularly gets bogged down by absurd dialogue, unbelievable characters, and other eye-rolling shenanigans. The episode scores a 5.5 out of 10. All recaps of The Tourist can be found on Reel Mockery here.