Wild Thing – The episode opens inside a cathedral where Lord Guildford Dudley (Edward Bluemel) stands quietly. Strapped to a table, Lady Jane Grey (Emily Bader) says, “Bullocks.” Dr. Butts (Kevin Eldon) opens his robe to expose a series of sharp instruments before saying an examination is needed to determine if Jane has Affliction. While palpating her abdomen, he assures her that he has no problem removing her spleen because it is useless. She tries to convince him to focus his attention on King Edward (Jordan Peters), not her. He collects a sample of blood – her own mixture of dried beetle shells and honey crystals – from inside her mouth. After heating the blood, he tastes it to determine it is sweet and there is no Affliction. Drawing his knife, he insists on bleeding her, so the wedding can go on. As he prepares to cut into the sole of her foot, she abruptly sits up and claims Butts healed her. Lady Frances Grey (Anna Chancellor) is not surprised by the revelation. She rejoins Guildford at the altar. The bishop (Haqi Ali) asks if she is better. She says, “I do.”
Frances orders Jane to stop playing games and assures her that the marriage will empower her. Jane argues that Guildford is now her proprietor. Frances expresses relief in knowing Jane is no longer her problem. She says Jane outranks Guildford because her great-grandfather was the King of England. Jane sarcastically asks if she fetched a good price for her. Frances assures her that she would have paid them to take her. Guildford asks Jane how she faked the blood. Denying the allegation, she suggests Butts was wrong and they will both die of Affliction. He says hopefully. She scolds Lady Margaret Grey (Robyn Betteridge) for helping herself to a cup of beer. Margaret admits to loving wine and claims Lady Katherine Grey (Isabella Brownson) loves bedding ceremonies. Katherine tells her to shut up. During a speech, Lord Dudley (Rob Brydon) toasts an unpopular Jane and his “rascal” son, Guildford. Princess Bess (Abbie Hern) warns the people against speaking unkindly about Edward.
Princess Mary (Kate O’Flynn) gives Edward a drink. Lord Seymour (Dominic Cooper) assures him that Jane is perfectly well. Charles (Christian Patterson) says Ethian resurgences are being reported in the north. Mary demands to know why Seymour allows the Pact leader, Archer (Michael Workeye) to live. Once alone, Edward whistles. A canine Petunia morphs into a human Petunia (Tallulah Greive) with a tray of food. While he devours the cheese, she says the poison smells like human decay and poop. He tells her that his father would boil the poisoner to death. She agrees to help him in exchange for him visiting his great-grandmother. He promises to do it.
As a virgin, Jane stresses over having sex with Guildford with spectators watching. Margaret prompts them to kiss. The crowd chants, “Kiss.” Guildford swings Jane around and leans her backward. She puckers her lips. He pulls her up and walks away, disappointing the crowd. Katherine and William (Brandon Grace) smile at each other from across the room. Jane foils an Ethian, Fitz’s (Joe Klocek) plan to steal money. She asks him about Susannah but he flees before she gets her answer. Planning to apologize, Guildford barges in to find Jane picking up the coins. He accuses her of trying to steal their wedding gift. She says it would come in handy when she leaves him. She repeats the nasty things that people say about him. He asks why she married him. She claims it was money and to keep Katherine from being forced to marry the Duke of Leicester. Jane is taken away to prepare for the bedding ceremony.
Guildford reluctantly removes his clothes. Dudley insists Guildford have sex with Jane to protect the marriage. Frances gives a disgruntled Jane a word of advice and encouragement. Lord Stan Dudley (Henry Ashton) admits to having a thing for Frances. Katherine suggests it hurts but Frances shuts her up. Jane and Guildford are shoved onto the bed and covered up. They rub their feet together. The spectators cheer and leave the room. Guildford asks Jane if she has ever been forced to do something. They are about to kiss when he jumps up to get a drink. Angry, she boasts of not needing a drink for courage. He says it is no wonder, Frances sold her to the highest bidder. She says her family had to buy him a wife before unknowingly shutting herself inside the closet. He refuses to open the door. Elsewhere, Frances has an orgasm but not Stan. Seeing the damaged ceiling, she begins to pry into Dudley’s finances while giving Stan oral sex.
Seymour invites Mary to share his bath. She reminds him that she hates bathing. He gives her a ring. She insists on his ring and tugs it from his finger. He says King Henry gave it to him. She licks the room to get her father’s blessing. Elsewhere, Lettie (Kimberley Nixon) lets Jane out of the closet. She warns that not having sex causes fits. Jane finds Guildford showering in the buff. After watching for a few minutes, she scolds him for locking her in the closet. He blames it on her and pleads with her to leave. She sarcastically says now that they are married, there is no being alone. When someone says, “Where are you,” he morphs into a horse. She urges him to change back when Dudley barges into the barn and informs her that Guildford is unable to control his transformations. Guildford is a man at night and a horse by day. Rupert (Stewart Scudamore) is Guildford’s groom. Jane is eager to end her marriage. Dudley explains the penalty of marrying an Ethian. If their secret is discovered, every member of the Dudley and Grey family would be executed. She boasts of having Edward’s protection. He says Edward is a Verity king who has handed down swift punishments for the Ethians. He sarcastically assures her that no real man would ever marry her.
Edward approaches a woman (Flip Webster) in the market and asks if she knows an herbalist. She shoos him away. He is relieved the woman didn’t recognize him. Morphing into a dog, Petunia sniffs around while Edward approaches Agnes (Ami Tredrea) selling flowers. He asks for something to induce sleep. She suggests chamomile. He tells her that it needs to induce permanent sleep. She orders him to go away. Morphing into a dog, Petunia alerts Edward that she found the scent. As two guards escort an elderly woman away, she admits to being a field mouse. When the guards ignore Edward’s prying, he turns his attention back to Agnes. She tells him that poison is verboten which she doesn’t possess. Petunia tosses him a gold box with “Tofana” and crossbones engraved on the lid and draws her knife. Edward asks who purchased Tofana from her. Petunia threatens to slash her throat if she doesn’t answer him. Agnes claims to have sold it to a man with a ring that looks like an eyeball.
Stan teases Jane about Guildford being a horse before holding out a chest from Edward. She opens the box to find a scabbard from her childhood. Stan tells her to say hello to Frances for him. Once alone, she opens a secret compartment inside the knife to reveal a note. A short time later, she meets Edward at their secret location. She returns the scabbard and says he looks better. He tells her that his friend may have ingested Tofana. She explains how Tofana works in small doses. She offers to stay and care for his friend but he insists she not abandon Guildford. Upset, she reminds him of how they used to do anything for each other. Their conversation ends on a sour note.
Taking his throne, Edward informs his council that he doesn’t have Affliction and is being poisoned. He suggests any one of them could be the culprit. Dudley and Seymour assure him that they will do whatever is necessary to find the responsible party. Edward says if they do not find the culprit, they will be labeled treasonous scoundrels and boiled. Standing up, he shoots them the bird and orders them to bugger off. In the hallway, Seymour and Dudley attribute Edward’s accusation to his Affliction. Slipping into Mary’s chamber, Seymour warns her that Edward is aware of the poison. Irate, she grabs him and starts to scold him. He urges her to keep her voice down. She demands he address her as Your Highness and takes charge from this point forward.
Stressed, Dudley sends Stan to retrieve Edward’s Will for the Succession from the Chancery. When Stan talks with his mouth full, Dudley knocks his pastry out of his hand and says whoever takes the crown will control the world. Elsewhere, Jane lures Rupert and Peter away from the carriage and starts to unhitch the horses when an armed Damian (Tom Durant Pritchard) approaches and orders her to open the chest. Anxious, Guildford the horse neighs loudly. Jane opens the chest to reveal several books about curing Ethianism. When Damian starts to abduct her, Guildford rears and neighs loudly. She throws a book at Damian. He stumbles and falls. She continues to throw books at him as he haphazardly flees and morphs into a goat. Rupert returns and asks if she is all right before retrieving the books.
Stan informs Frances that Edward’s Will for the Succession is missing. He asks if he can come inside but she refuses. He voices concern about what Dudley will do when he finds out. She says they are all screwed. In Edward’s chamber, Seymour tells him that Dudley has been poisoning him. Dudley denies the allegation. Seymour pulls Tofana from Dudley’s pocket. Edward stares at the box. Mary physically attacks Dudley. Edward orders the guards to put Dudley in the Tower of London. Bess takes Petunia away. Mary insists on taking Edward to North Turret. While she covers him with a cloak, he sees the eye ring on her necklace. She dashes powder at him.
Guildford pleads with Jane to try to find a cure for his Ethianism. She expresses her desire to be independent. He vows to end their marriage when she cures him. She forces him to promise to never tell her to obey him again. He releases her from her martial duties. They agree to sleep in separate chambers.
Edward is startled awake by a clap of thunder and remembers Petunia. Hearing Mary and Seymour approaching, he races to wedge a chair against the door. He considers jumping out the window. Mary and Seymour break into the chamber and search everywhere for him. The mere thought of Edward falling to his death ignites a burst of laughter. Edward’s robe is lying in the moat below. The episode ends.
My Lady Jane Review
Lady Jane Grey cannot get out of her marriage to Lord Guildford Dudley but this will not stop her from trying to escape. It doesn’t take long to learn the real reason why the two of them were thrown together. Jane is unpopular among men and Guildford is an Ethian. Unlike most Ethians, Guildford cannot control his transformation. He lives as a horse at night and a human during the day. Knowing Jane is an intellectual, he believes she can find a cure for his Ethianism. She agrees to help him in exchange for a divorce.
Edward’s dog, Petunia is actually an Ethian sent by her great-grandmother to inform him that he is being poisoned. Edward and Petunia find the herbalist, Agnes, responsible for the Tofana utilized to poison him. Agnes sold Tofana to a man with an “eye” ring. Edward threatens to boil his council if they do not bring him the culprit. The real poisoners – Mary and Seymour – pin it on Dudley. Edward orders Dudley’s arrest but later sees the eye ring hanging from Mary’s necklace. Bess takes Petunia away. Mary and Seymour are not ready to abandon their plan just yet.
The script is cleverly written and played out. The directing and editing are executed with skill and efficiency. The acting continues to be the show’s strongest asset. The narration by Oliver Chris is the worst. On a good note, it is utilized less often in the second episode.
Tom Durant Pritchard makes a guest appearance on the show. He will join the Miss Scarlet season 5 cast as Alexander Blake. Stuart Martin (William “The Duke” Wellington) has stepped away from the show. It deserves a 6.2 out of 10.
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Jay Skelton is a fan of all television shows and movies. He tries his best to keep up with the latest foreign television shows and movies. Jay loves skinny dipping in the dark too.
