As the first episode of Marriage begins, Ian (Sean Bean) and Emma (Nicola Walker) sit together at the airport café. Emma complains about having to pay 30 cents for ketchup. Ian wants to know about his potato. Emma didn’t ask him because he was about 12 and barely spoke English. Once they finish, Emma tries to find out what is going on with Ian and whether it is the potato thing. After going to the bathroom, they wait in line to get on the plane. They continue talking about the potato that Ian wanted. Ian thinks she should’ve asked the clerk about the potato because he would’ve. He accuses her of turning this into something. Once they get on the plane, Emma reminds Ian that he ate the chips so she doesn’t know why he is making such a fuss about the potato. She doesn’t think this is about chips or potatoes. Ian asks if she is going there. Emma says they’ve had a lovely holiday and she hasn’t done anything wrong.

Ian asks why it was so hard to ask him if he could make him a jacket potato. He asks again before Emma admits she can’t believe they’re arguing about jacket potatoes. Ian believes the point is that he would’ve asked for her. She tells him to just do his crossword and shut the heck up. Ian eventually tells her to shut up and leave him  alone. Their argument eventually stops and the music takes over. They make it home, collect their mail, and begin carrying their belongings inside. Moments later, Ian asks how her tummy is and gives her a package. They agree to watch television instead of reading tonight. Jessica (Chantelle Alle) contacts Emma to say she wants to come over Monday with Adam. The next day, they visit Emma’s dad Gerry (James Bolam). Outside, Emma and Ian talk about their underwear as they hear inside. Emma says she’ll explain that they’re on their way to see Nicholas. They go inside and say hello to Gerry.

Emma tells him that they won’t stay long because they’re going to see Nicholas. While Ian messes around in the kitchen, Emma talks to her father about the beer and food. They mainly stayed by the pool and red, but went into the sea as well. Emma asks if Paul (Kemal Sylvester) has taken him anywhere. Gerry wonders how she can ask if he had a good time when she abandoned him. When Ian enters with tea, he asks Gerry if Emma has told him about Jess. Gerry doesn’t seem to like Ian very much. Ian and Emma leave as Ian says he just made the tea and pretended that Garry doesn’t hate him. Paul comes down and makes sure they’re gone before asking Gerry how many she brought. Gerry shows him while arguing that he always sees the worst in her.

Paul calls her so fake, but Gerry thinks it is Ian controlling her. Paul knows they’re going to see Nicholas. He thinks Emma always has to play the victim. Emma thinks she should be able to go away with her husband on vacation without feeling bad. Ian doesn’t want to wind her up. When she complains that Gerry didn’t mention all the postcards, Ian says they were up in the kitchen. He gives her the card and she doesn’t want to read it. They walk to Nicholas’s grave and leave the card. They sit on a bench and Emma begins crying. Ian cries next. Once they leave, they discuss treats for her, hugs, and kisses. Back at home, Ian suggests getting two bottles in case Adam wants some. Ian asks if she has to do that now.

Emma does because she has Jamie first thing. Ian talks about the freedom of not having a job anymore. At work, Emma’s coworkers talk before Mark leaves a cup on Emma’s desk. Claire (Kath Hughes) warns him that she’ll go mad. Once Emma enters, she is introduced to Emily (Shona McHugh) who is there for work experience. She is also told that Jamie (Henry Lloyd-Hughes) wants to see her. Ian goes to the Alder Tree Leisure Centre. He says hello to Maxine before going inside where she checks him into the gym. Jamie talks to Emma about her jacket before changing the subject to her vacation to Spain. Jamie loves the color on her. He says she can’t go away again because those two and the work experience person aren’t great. She returns to her desk and talks to her coworkers about her new jacket.

Ian prepares to leave the gym, but stops to talk to Maxine. He asks if she is chained up here or if she gets to work out. Maxine likes to burn off some energy when she gets the chance. She excuses herself and goes into the back room where she hides out. She has to go back out when someone enters. Ian apologizes before leaving. Maxine leaves and catches up with Amos at the bar. When she gets out of the bathroom, she shows off her ring. Ian goes back to the leisure centre to ask for Maxine. He thinks he accidentally upset Maxine earlier today. He is told he could write her a little message. Ian asks when she’ll be in tomorrow, but the worker can’t tell him so Ian decides to leave. Emma makes it home later and finds Ian out back watering the garden.

Ian admits his day was a bit boring. Emma says she’d love the chance to be bored before Ian tells her it is nice to have her back. Jessica talks to Adam about her father being weird in some ways, but not others. His mom died and he lost his job yet he still goes around being cheery. He doesn’t convince anyone and not even himself. She begins talking about the baby stuff before admitting that her parents really don’t talk. Meanwhile, Emma and Ian prepare at home. Adam tells Jessica that this is what made her an artist. She is a wild spirit brought up in a world of conformity. Emma is surprised that Ian has been noticing what she is wearing. Jessica and Adam arrive moments later. Jessica tells them that she had a gig, but Nathan wouldn’t let her leave. When alone, Emma mentions to Ian that they’re not drinking and that concerns her. They argue over who should go talk to him.

Ian gives Adam the cashews. Adam is busy on his phone and promises to put it down, but Ian tells him to do whatever he needs to do. Once they sit down, they begin talking about their holiday. Ian’s mom died a few months ago and he got made redundant a few weeks ago. They discuss the possibility of Jessica coming to Spain with them. Ian and Emma talk about the restaurants and how much they thought Jessica would’ve liked it. Adam says it is a very important time for Jessica to get people down to her gigs to see her. Ian cleans up later while Jessica loiters behind him. Jessica tells Emma that she thinks he is fitting in because he is very unique and clever. She reveals Adam doesn’t like her to drink and he talks a lot about marriage. He says he wants to be with her forever so she thinks it is a compliment. Jessica and Adam thank them and leave a short time later.

Emma and Ian begin cleaning up without speaking to one another. Eventually, he asks what she thinks of Adam. Meanwhile, Adam tells Jessica that Ian sees him as a threat because it is a man thing. Jessica says her dad never talks to her or listens to anything she says so he can’t see him as a threat. Emma argues that she won’t marry that creep while Ian says he isn’t even attractive. Adam tells Jessica that he has been in relationships before where the girl was always siding with her dad. He promised himself he’d never get into that kind of relationship again. Jessica promises she won’t side with him. She goes on to say she is his over and over. Emma complains about Adam not eating the salad before calling him a beast. Ian says she barely said goodbye when she used to fling herself at him. He scoffs at the idea that he is a record producer.

Emma reveals nothing comes up if you Google him. They get into bed together before Emma says it is so depressing that she has such dreadful taste in men. She believes Emma will get rid of him eventually. When Ian asks about her early start, he learns that she is meeting clients with Jamie. Ian asks about Jamie and whether he missed her. Emma asks him not to start this because they’ll never get to sleep. Emma gets up in the morning and gets ready without waking Ian.

 

Marriage Review

With the likes of Sean Bean, Nicola Walker, James Bolam, and Henry Lloyd-Hughes, Marriage was hotly anticipated. Bean, Walker, and Lloyd-Hughes are among some of my favorites so I was really looking forward to Marriage, but it is hard to be excited about this after the first episode. The story follows Ian and Emma as they return from vacation in Spain. Ian’s mother died months before and he was let go from his job just weeks ago leaving Emma as the only worker in the house.

There seem to be conflict at every turn with Garry and Paul badmouthing the couple behind their backs. Jessica, who I’d assume is an adopted daughter, is in a relationship with Adam that is quickly becoming serious against Ian and Emma’s wishes. Ian and Emma rarely talk to one another at least not about anything significant. The series does a lot of nothing without a lot of dialogue and a one-track soundtrack that is often far too loud.

Apparently, Stefan Golaszewski has attempted to replicate a conventional British marriage on the small screen with a lack of communication. While the series hits the target sometimes, the realism factor just isn’t here. There are too many nuisances that make the show feel so unrealistic. For starters, it is hard to connect with the Ian character because the character is either a pervert or preposterous. At times, Ian wanders through scenes as if he is the primary cause of the current Adderall shortage.

He acted odd at the gym and even terrified a young girl which somehow transformed into a whole storyline of its own. Not to mention the fact that he threw a fit over a potato for ten minutes or so. The reality factor continues cracking with the introduction of the daughter or step-daughter. There was no indication that Jessica had been raised by Ian and Emma because the chemistry wasn’t there. It is also tiresome that she just happens to be an artist and Adam is a record producer. In reality, real people aren’t fortunate enough to pick fantastical careers when they have to pay rent and put food on the table.

So many productions give characters unrealistic careers like there is something repulsive about manual labor or a conventional blue-collar job. The relationship dynamic between Ian and Emma is intriguing at times, but often off-putting. The series gives the impression that the writer is so far from reality without any real understanding of normal individuals, their relationships, or the lives they live.

Having watched this episode twice now, the first time was a lot more disappointing to the point that it felt like a career killer. However, the second watch just made the episode seem forgettable and it is probably a good idea for everyone for this to be forgotten. The episode scores a 4.5 out of 10. Recaps of Marriage can be found on Reel Mockery here. Learn how to support our work at this link.