Pilot – The episode begins with Colonel Patrick Quinn (Denis Leary) preparing for his press release to announce that he taking emergency command of USAG Baumholder. Before doing so, he meets with General Davidson (Joe Morton), where he learns that he’s actually taking command of USAG Stroopsdorf, 90 minutes away in the Netherlands. Davidson then mockingly proceeds to show Quinn why he is being stationed there.
When Quinn and XO Major Abraham Shah (Danny Pudi) show up at Stoopsdorf, they are surprised to learn that the base looks like it’s inside a bowling alley. Despite this, Quinn is almost beside himself when he meets a soldier with shoulder-length hair. This is when Quinn vows to turn the base into an actual combat base and get promoted back to Baumholder.
It isn’t until Quinn meets Sergeant Dana Conway (Laci Mosley) that he realizes how hard the transformation will be. Apparently, the base isn’t just open to the Dutch public but it is known for providing cheese, laundry, and bowling to bases in Germany and Belgium.
Quinn gets his biggest surprise yet when he orders Private Anthony ‘BA’ Chapman (Dempsey Bryk) to take him to the base commander and he takes him to meet Captain Maggie Quinn (Taylor Misiak), Quinn’s daughter. Things do not go any better when Maggie and Quinn retire to the Teen Center for a more private conversation. After Quinn tells her that his punishment is being stuck here with her, Maggie remembers exactly why she cut off contact with him 2 years ago.
Quinn and Maggie’s discussion eventually becomes so heated that Shah has to step in. Quinn tells Shah that he was trying to leave the military out of his problems with Maggie but Shah claims he needs the military involved now more than ever. As an example, Shah asks Maggie if she has concerns about the Colonel commanding Stoopsdorf. She says that she does and has spent the last 10 months planning a crucial mission that could destabilize the base if it fails. Shah asks what this mission is Maggie says they are marching in the Tulip Festival tomorrow. Quinn perceives this as a joke, but before he can say much more, Maggie tells him that he will break the base trying to fix it because there is nothing wrong with the base.
When Quinn asks Maggie to show him one thing right about the base she takes him to the dining facility. Shah isn’t shy to admit that Stoopsdorf serves one of the finest meals he’s ever had, whereas Quinn is too proud to admit anything, despite the look on his face with each bite. After their meal, Quinn addresses his soldiers for the first time and introduces himself and his mission. To show the group how serious he is, he orders an immediate round of physical training. Corporal Elias Papadakis (Hal Cumpston) has an especially hard time with the training and Quinn makes the entire group stand by until he completes the tire cross. The group ends up hanging around until the middle of the night until Maggie steps in and takes blame for the lack of physical fitness. She claims that she has been focusing efforts elsewhere.
The following morning before attending the Tulip Festival, Quinn goes to visit the Supply Sergeant Conway, who is responsible for sourcing the ingredients for the lavish lifestyle the soldiers at Stoopsdorf have been living. It doesn’t take him long to discover that she has been grossly misappropriating army funds, but rather than getting mad, he offers her a spot on Team Shiny.
Maggie briefs Quinn on the rich history of the festival and even gives him index cards for the march, but is far too proud to use them and throws them in the trash. Even without the cards, Quinn’s speech goes rather well until the bowling portion of the parade comes out. Although he embarrasses himself, the unit, and insults the country, Shah saves him some embarrassment by unplugging the microphone at the podium.
Later that night, Quinn tracks down Maggie in town and not only apologizes but offers her a spot on Team Shiny. Much to his surprise, she not only turns him down but she practically tells him to get lost. He does not take this so well. Despite this, he calls her shortly after he leaves and asks why she followed in his footsteps if she hates him so much. She tells him it is because she wants to be of service, possibly serve in the Senate, and maybe even be President one day. As the conversation goes back and forth, Quinn becomes overwhelmed with emotions and nearly cries. This causes Maggie to see him in a different light and after a bit of teasing, she agrees to co-run the base with him. This is practically how the episode ends.
Going Dutch Recap
I certainly cannot say this was a great premiere. The jokes were hit-and-miss, there was absolutely no acting required, and Papadakis had to be the most annoying thing I’ve seen on TV in a while. Even though he only got about 6 minutes of airtime, I almost fast-forwarded through his parts. Other than that, the story wasn’t bad, and I liked the ‘Major Payne’ feel. I can get behind the fact that there is a conflict, and it will take two strong-headed characters to set aside their differences to achieve it. For that, I would have to give the premiere a 5.4 out of 10.
Get more Going Dutch recaps here. See what others are saying about the series by clicking the link. Check out our advertising packages here. Support our platform by clicking the link.
