As the pilot episode of Creamerie begins, we see a bunch of men in the showers. We’re told it is day one of the event. One man coughs up blood and spits it on the wall. Then, the others begin getting ill and spitting out blood as well. On day 30, they’re forced to burn a pyramid of dead bodies. It continues until day 2920. We join a chorus of women singing “What A Wonderful World” together. Pip (Perlina Lau), Jaime (J.J. Fong), and Alex (Ally Xue) watch from the audience. When one of the babies on stage begins crying, Alex yells encouraging her to cry harder because it is only going to get worse. Pip argues with her before Alex takes her green drink and tolerates a swig. They bicker about guys being a trigger word now and other things. Alex is told to quieten down because Lane (Tandi Wright) is here.
Lane joins Michelle (Kimberley Crossman) on stage and puts up her hand to tell the crowd to stop clapping. The audience raises their hands with her while Alex gives her the middle finger. Lane talks to the women of Hiro Valley about the virus taking all of the world’s men eight years ago today. She says the time for harking back is over because they’ve built something wonderful in eight years. Now, they have education and healthcare for all as well as mandatory menstruation leave. While Jaime and Pip are really into the speech, Alex could care less. She continues insulting Lane who says they have seed and their past trauma does not make them weak. As Lane says they’ll overcome the virus and create a brave new world, Alex throws the green drink and covers her dress with it.
The police officer Constance (Nikki Si’ulepa) quickly finds out who did it and takes Alex to the jail. Alex is warned that assaulting the mayor is a blissable offense although she pretends not to care. They argue about Constance being drunk with power. Constance grabs her shirt and pushes her against the wall before Alex begins pleasuring her down below. Constance returns the favor while the others wait for the re-population draw. Two women are picked and Jaime happens to be one of them. Back at the jail, Constance wonders if they could go away for a week, but Alex quickly changes the subject to a blackhead on her face. Another security officer knocks on the door so Constance rushes to get dressed. Alex gets on her knees and prepares to be shot in the head.
She encourages Constance to go ahead and get it over with. Before long, Alex is shot, something is embedded in the back of her neck, and she falls to the ground. At their farm, Jaime and Pip try to inseminate a cow. Once they’ve finished, Constance brings Alex home. Constance tells them what has happened before Jaime takes an impaired Alex inside. Before Constance leaves, Pip tries to convince her that she didn’t throw the cup even though it had her name on it. As Jaime puts Alex in bed, Alex suggests Jackson wanted to sleep with her. Pip enters and they strap Alex to the bed. Alex goes to sleep. Then, we see Lane talking about the re-population lottery which she says has been successful for ensuring a healthy future. She explains they’re slowly using the sperm in the sperm banks collected before the virus was released.
Jaime watches as Lane says the sperm is gifted to the best candidates. She begins talking to Viv (Renee Lyons) who says her number has been picked four times, but she has never been able to get past the next stage. Next, Jaime’s vulva is examined to ensure everything will be fine. She learns it is impressively healthy before confirming she has only had one successful pregnancy nine years ago. She is warned there is a 50% risk of miscarriage because the baby boys die. She is told it isn’t like a baby at that stage and is more like a little pink piece of Y chromosome snot. When asked about her weekly orgasms, she admits they haven’t been great. She is instructed to get busy and bring it up to tri-weekly if possible. Once Alex wakes up, she is spotted wearing a badge that says, “I am in bliss”.
She finds a note telling her to go get something to eat. Meanwhile, Pip tries to place plates on the table but ends up dropping food everywhere. She works quickly to clean up the mess. Before she can, Lane enters with the doctor and Lane says an abundant future is her top priority. Pip comes out of hiding and explains herself. The doctor is excused before Lane says she loves the fact that she can trust Pip to do the right thing and keep confidences. She says her door is always open if there is something she’d like to talk about. When Michelle and the others enter the room, Pip is told she can leave now. Alex eats and finds another note. She finds a bottle attached to a mask and a note encouraging her to suck on it. Once she finishes sucking on it, she flosses her teeth. Another note tells her to find the lump on her neck while another directs her to use the scalpel to make a 15-degree incision and remove the bliss ball.
Jaime hangs out with another woman who agrees to put on the clothes Jaime brought with her. When the woman changes clothes, Jaime imagines that she turns into Jackson (Yoson An). While they kiss and make out, Jackson tells Jaime what he did that day. Jaime wants him to ask about her day too. When he does, she tells him she is going to have another baby and they’re going to be a family again. Jaime returns home and learns from Pip that Alex has gone missing. As they begin looking for her, they find a bloody towel and become worried. Alex sits with her mother and tells her about being blissed once again. She says she has found a new way to mess with them. Her mother looks like she has some type of wound on the side of her head. Alex walks down the street and wipes her blood on the posters of Lane.
Jaime warns Pip that they’re not going to promote someone who allowed a blissed person to die. Pip rushes out to the truck and Jaime gets in seconds later. As they speed away, they hit something and worry that it might be Alex. They get out to get a closer look before finding a body on the ground. They quickly come up with a story to tell the authorities. Alex walks up and scares them so they realize they didn’t kill her. When Alex flips over the body, she is surprised to find that it is a man. They can’t believe it since there weren’t supposed to be any men left. Although they believe it could be a fake beard, Alex proves otherwise. When the man wakes up, he scares them so they hit him in the head.
Creamerie Review
While not perfect, the first episode of Creamerie was a good starting point. It quickly established the premise of the show, the main characters, and their struggles. One thing I liked is the fact that the story is unique and interesting. It is hard to judge the actors and actresses considering this is a comedy show that doesn’t always take itself seriously, but they seemed to do okay.
Unfortunately, the comedy wasn’t a big hit with me. I don’t recall laughing once although some people may like this type of humor. To me, it is quirkier and sillier than hilarious, but everyone is different. Regardless, I am interested in seeing where things go from here so something worked. If the show would take the story a little more seriously, I think Creamerie could be a hit. The opening episode scores a 6.5 out of 10. All Creamerie recaps will be available on Reel Mockery here.
Jay Skelton is a fan of all television shows and movies. He tries his best to keep up with the latest foreign television shows and movies. Jay loves skinny dipping in the dark too.
